I’m not a serial dater and i don’t qualify as one. I haven’t been on to that many dates either as usually i turn out to date someone whom i already befriended. So there wasn’t any awkward first date. You know what i mean...
Today, i’m just writing from what i have experience...
A definite not-to-do on a first date/meet:
1. Do not spend too much time on your phone.
You might give the impression to the other person that there are far more important thing than him/her OR you’re just not interested, which is why are you actually going out again?
Okay,,but practically, we do this sometime because we kindda do not know what to do, as in to break the dead silence or stiffness.
I’m not encouraging this, but i think it is acceptable that later on if the date just goes out real bored or after the past two hours you realize he/she is not your type...as if it were me, i’ll turn to my phone, sms-ing my friend “get me out of here!” (kidding! Naah. Actually i do that. Some of my lucky friends must have gotten this kind of sms from me. Don’t worry, i’m not being kidnapped, I’m just stuck in a sucking date) Vice-versa if i get the no chemistry vibe, the other person is excusable for such act.
Let’s be flexible okay, if IT’S not there, it just isn’t.
But try not to do it in the beginning of the date, you don’t want to ruin the mood.
p.s sila jangan perasan. This is not something new, we all know this should not be done. Im just writing the obvious.
2. Do not ask the girl to buy you something.
I follow the traditional rule on a first date / meeting, do not guys, i cannot emphasis myself more, i repeat DO NOT ask the girl to buy you a drink and a cheesy wedges (owh..does that sounds fimilar?).
Maybe some guys are trying to be funny when they do that, which i and probably the whole of the female gender in the whole world just turn off.
And after that, don’t keep repeating yourself asking the girl to belanja you. I get it as a joke if you say it once in awhile. But i must have missed my counting because i feel like some kind of record machine, that is all that ever comes out of his mouth.
Now that i just said it, i might just share it.
It wasn’t a date, it was a first meeting. He came with a friend of mine. Initially we were messaging and i get the feeling he was interested. Unplanned, that lunch i decided to have lunch at a place near his office. I told my friend i was going there, and she must have passed the information to him. I don’t know whether to be flattered or what after the whole experience, but since we’re near so he thought it’d be a good idea to meet there. That’s fine with me, so i said see you there!
So then we met, and i was about to order myself a snack plate. As a courtesy they say, i asked do you want something? I’m fine if he wants something really because i was just about to buy myself some food anyway. But i didn’t expect him to say yea...a coke (or was it pepsi? Whatever) and a cheesy wedges.
I tried not to be negative at first, but i must have been really been turned off..i bought him french fries instead. So when the food come, he said “where’s the cheesy wedges?” . Once again, i was being polite and i did the entire meeting, although i already cancelled him in my mind.. i replied,,i totally forgot, sorry.i thought you wanted french fries. (duh!it’s still deep fried potato! Can you at least say thank you that I still bought you bought you the food)
All and all, he wasn’t my type. I’ll spare his jokes and acts which i don’t get. Lacks immature and the looks just isn’t my type an all.
Surprisingly some days after that, we chatted as a friend-to-friend basis, and he has the audacity to asked me to belanje him again. And i think evertime we chatted i’m quite sure he mentioned about belanja-ing him. At one point he passed one remarks that if he were not friends with my best friends, i would have given him mine too.
Oh man, i have never in my entire life meet a guy as cheapskate and puts himself in a position so low. Look lah, i get it yang ko tgh xda duit sebab ko ni baru je keje kan, tapi ko reti adab tak? Tak perlu la minta orang belanje ko berkali2, and setiap kali ulang ko xda duit2. Aku tahu la ko miskin. Think i figured that out quick. Lain lah kalo aku ni best friend for life ko, like hello, we just met. Ever heard of making a first good impression?
I know you’re trying to save yourself money, but there’s much more valuable thing you ought to save. Your dignity and pride.
p/s weird, that it crossed your mind that you’re my type, because you’re not and you would have figured it out when i didn’t give you my number when you asked for it.
This also response to a statement from miss anonymous, ppl do ask for my number, not all the time, just sometimes, but i don’t give it away everytime. Ada kapish?
3. Do not come together.
If you have your own car, drive yourself there to the place and meet him there. For safety precaution in case you have to get out of the date, you can make up a silly excuse and run off. To hell if the excuse make sense or if he knows you’re trying to get away. I say go save yourself.
P.s sila jangan perasan sekali lagi. (these day i feel there is always somebody like terasa gila with my writing, who can blame them, i guess i did write about real people, but not everything is about them, so chill okay).
THAT was just from my experience. I heard on the radio once about this topic, one i remember was that her date was picking his nose in the car. EEww. Gross.I would jump out of the car and get a cab home if i were her. Like i said, drive your own car to the date.
I think those are obvious of a dont’-do on a first date. Generally if you’re a sane and reasonable person, there isn’t a prince charming sweeping you off you feet criteria to be fulfilled. So just act normal and it’ll be fine! (fingers crossed)
Good Luck!
